The 20 Top Things to NEVER do before you Die

#1 Clean Up For the Maintenance Guy

Clean everything out of your kitchen cabinets, clean your bathroom, store your pets (where, we don't know). Do it by 7am tomorrow. For we are the maintenance crew and this apartment belongs to us now. And we do not sit with the slobs of the city. Our dirty shoes shan't step upon the dirty carpet of a young up and comer, just trying to survive in a harsh, harsh world. Clean up for us immediately, no matter what Ricky says (some names have been changed). Pure lies are the tales of pest control without proper cleanup last year, whilst a man who dares to bare the name Ricky (some names have been changed) sat on the couch and watched us. Pure lies, we say! And we will not be ignored!

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